Quotes : “Learning to trust is one of life’s most difficult tasks” “Trust is to human relationships what faith is to gospel living. It is the beginning place, the foundation upon which more can be built on. Where trust is, love can flourish”
Why should I trust you?
What trait you do value most? What makes a good relationship? What do you look for in a partner? Regardless of business or personal relationships, ‘trust’ or its deviation ‘trustworthy’ is the answer to all of the questions. The query that is left to ponder upon is why is it so difficult to learn to trust?
On the surface, it seems relatively easy to trust someone. When an individual has done no harm to you, you have no reason to ‘put up you guard’ so to speak. As time goes on, you continue to build on the faith you have in that individual. Since no effort was put into developing those levels of trust, it is perceived to be easily and effortlessly attained. Looking back at the time you first met a new friend, you do the usual ‘meet and greet’ custom. Sharing of interest then naturally followed and there, the foundation of trust begun. Instead of evaluating the confidence you have in your new friend, more time was probably spent on self-consciousness and wondering whether others will accept you. With a blank space, trust is easily learnt.
In certain circumstances, it is difficult to learn to trust. Sometimes previous events influence your choice to place faith in someone completely new. In other situations, regaining trust that was lost proves to be a challenge. More often than not, these issues occur in abusive relationships. A violent event would have traumatised an individual physically, emotionally or mentally. Consequently, the tormenting experience has conditioned the person to deem individuals with certain traits impossible to trust. They are afraid that history may repeat itself forcing the person to relive the distressing incident once again. Commonly, a drunken husband would unconsciously attack his wife by a series of beating and yelling. His wife is inflicted with fear that torture may become a part of her daily life. Subsequent to the divorce, she becomes hesitant to associate with drunken individuals especially men. Her doubt in drunken people is an example of why trust is difficult to be regained following an agonising experience.
The trust you have in me started with a light conversation. With no efforts at all, it seems the confidence you have in people is simply managed. However, when matters get out of control, it is a whole different scene. If I were to be the one who caused you much pain, you will have difficulty trusting me and those who resemble me. Whether it be a drinking habit or a raise in voice, any little reminiscence you have of me, will make you cautious of whom you will have faith in the future. In me, you will no longer trust.